bruh i lit just post boring text posts like 87% of the time sorry
Fujifilm Superia 200+Minolta X-300s.
|how do you and or your followers deal with being labeled as unattractive for being a poc? even though i avoid white people, white standards are pervasive as fuck and i'm tired of feeling ugly.|
I saw this quote on Tumblr and I think it about sums up how I feel when people say “Asians / Asian men are unattractive”
That is: You thinking i’m not attractive, is not going to stop me from being attractive.
So this ask actually hits real close to home because I’ve dealt with this shit for pretty much my entire life.
White beauty standards are fucking gross.
But I think what’s worse is as POC, we not only have to measure up to white beauty standards but we have the added bonus of racial caricatures. That shit fucked me up real bad.
This meant (to name a few):
- Looking at every photo and thinking my eyes were too small and hating them cause some fuckers decided to tell me to open my eyes as wide as possible and then laughed and said, “Wow that’s the biggest they’ll go?” (I know realize that my eyes are actually pretty big so idk what them fuckers were talking about. And like small eyes aren’t ugly???? They cute.)
- Growing up thinking, “Fuck. My monolids.” As well as STRUGGLING REAL HARD to apply eye make up cause like ???? there are no good tutorials for that shit?
- Thinking I couldn’t dye my hair certain colors cause it would look tacky.
- Thinking I was too short.
- Thinking my deep brown eyes were boring and ugly.
- Thinking I wasn’t “pretty enough” for an Asian (and later on with the fucking rise of kpop, Korean) girl.
- Thinking being called “pretty for an Asian chick” was a compliment.
- Wishing I was white.
Like w o w. I was on some other level self-hate. But I mean…it happens. Here are some things that may help:
- Accept every compliment you receive. Do not try to deny it, even if if you don’t believe it. Then, repeat the words back to yourself. Let them sink in. Soak in the positivity.
- Every time you feel ugly, dissect that shit. Ask yourself why you feel ugly and where that’s coming from. 100% of the time, it’s nonsense. But unless you actually spell it out for yourself, those thoughts will take over. Cut them up and leave them out to dry before they drain you. Do not give them power.
- For each negative thought you have about your appearance, think of at least two to counter it. If you can’t think of any, ask your friends.
- Take selfies. LOTS and LOTS of selfies. Do not delete them.
- Make yourself look at your face and body. Check yourself out. Do a little dance in the mirror. Make funny faces. Get used to seeing your reflection. Trust me, it helps.
- Compliment yourself.
- If you feel that you can’t call yourself beautiful yet, repeat this mantra: “I am not ugly.” One day, you will truly believe it. It took me 20 years but it happened. I still have down days and I don’t quite think I’m pretty but I don’t think I’m ugly. And that, in and of itself, is huge.
- Give yourself a break. Purging beauty standard BS out of your mind takes time and you’re not gonna think you’re not ugly overnight. I mean it’d be fucking great if that were possible but…realistically, that shit is not gonna happen. So don’t beat yourself up for not “progressing fast enough”. It’s okay. You’ll get there.
- Recognize that white beauty standards are another form of oppression. Recognize that you will never be white. I know that this seems like a “duh.” kind of thing but repeat that several times and let it really sink in.
- Recognize that racial stereotypes/caricatures do not define you.
- Recognize that you’re not here for anyone. And by that, I mean: It’s not your job to be “pretty” or “beautiful” for anyone but yourself. Once you kinda accept this, you start to care less.
I feel like I rambled but I really hope this somewhat helps, anon. I know it’s not easy and while I’m a lot better than I was, I still have a lot of off days/moments. I wish you the best of luck and I hope one day you will believe me when I say, “You are beautiful.”
"The Visitor" by Deih - Fanzara, Spain
Sam Pepper is sorry 🙌
WTF IS THIS.
My 12 year old brother participated in this survey thing for money and he had to write a taste review for Arnott’s ‘Shapes’ and this is what he wrote:
"While I was eating the shapes I could actually taste the pizza flavour it actually felt like real pizza. I didn’t know how good it was until I actually tastes the pizza. I actually like how unique they shaped the biscuit. I am happy to say that shapes pizza tastes like pizza. I appreciated eating shapes."
Jenny O’Connell (via observando)
Do you prefer to be a good boy or a bad boy in your life?
tom in the streets loki in the sheets
i wanted to bring this back - it’s an interesting look into the mind of a man who had a taboo sexual fantasy that went against societal norms and the damage early childhood trauma can do to a person.
the difference between sam pepper and shane dawson
- posted this ^^^ video giving a sincere apology
- hes deleted his videos of him doing blackface
- hes admitted he was being ignorant and that he should not have done his blackface videos
- hes admitted hes in the wrong
- hes done his research on the history of blackface (he did not previously know the history of blackface) and has agreed its fucked up
- hes explained the reasoning why he did blackface, and why it was not meant to be malicious and he just didn’t know anything about the subject matter, but agrees it is wrong and he shouldn’t have done it
- hes read posts/tweets of people calling him out and is using them to inform himself of what he is doing wrong so he can learn from his mistakes
- HE HAS ADMITTED HES MADE MISTAKES AND IS MAKING CHANGES TO LEARN FROM HIS MISTAKES
- hes apologized to specific twitter users that he knows have been offended by his videos
- hes stated all the people calling him ‘racist’ he deserves because of his blackface videos, even though he defends the fact he’s not racist and he genuinely sorry
sam pepper has:
- threatened people that called him out on his bullshit
- been a complete asshole
- defended his actions
- has not apologized
aka: sam pepper is an ass but shane dawson is doing his best and is trying to become a better person and move away from the bad shit he’s done in the past, including blackface
dont support sam pepper but don’t drag shane down too bc for real hes honestly trying his hardest to learn from his mistakes and become a better person and move away from the offencive shit hes done bc he knows its fucked up and wrong